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Tuesday November 30, 2004
Just a Thought
Open thy mouth and speak those words which impels one soul and spirit to soar above the spited crying of the forked tongued people, for society is but a refuge for the agreeable commended domestic world
An old wooden fence post clenched in rusty wire protruded
through the grassy pasture, along side stretched the tall
pine trees and patches of kudzu, the ground covered in the
residue of leaves and straw from seasons past. The scent of
honeysuckle and onion grass filled my surroundings as I
traveled through the branches, this walk I've made a thousand
times or more but today it was different somehow, today
I felt like an intruder to this exploring world, the humming
of the wild life puts an erie feeling in me, I feel captured by
the consuming life which surrounds me, cold and damp
immobilized unable to retreat, up ahead just beyond the
trees lies the future. What a ghostly moan the wind made as
it blew past my stale body just now, a beloved spirit to deliver
a peaceful sleep, for such a glorious gift I remain invisible,
today I'm restless unable to turn, yesterday the choices
were mine, today I can make no difference in such a cold and
dark world where I exist just below the surface in this
tortured darkness I remain to live out my past, for me
the future was yesterday and it too has pasted.
What an engraving destiny awaits us all in this underneath
place we call The Graveyard!
Visions of dreams echoes of screams. Red velvet draped against her skin, her whispers tell me she is my friend. Sharp black nails in my back the look in her eyes glare as deep as Halloween night. She neither a trick nor offers a treat her steady breathing give off the heat. I try to move but remain paralyzed in the nightmarish dream; I can’t bear one more moment with her, “The Scream Queen!”
Dust and ashes from a burning flame, This was no dream it’s just her game.
The parted darkness falls on the heavy night, all but sadness has dissipated in this weary soul of mine. I stare into the black curtains of the sky. The edge of the earth stands before me shall I jump in to that which has pursued me all these years, or should I notice this “Angel of Hope” as she sits with teary eyes trying to save me from the darken pits of hell! As my arms reach out light pierces my dark damp graven tomb in which I exist. Now I spread my wings for She has given me flight!
When I was growing up I lived on the outskirts of this small town, most everyone here knew everything about each other, rumors and gossip fueled this place like the long connecting gas pipes that ran underground, a peaceful stranger would feel the weight of the cold stares piercing down, I know I too was this stranger drifting place to place looking for what I called home, for me this place seemed like paradise on earth, I had no idea in fact I'd stumbled into hell. I can only image that day the look on my face must have been sheer pleasure, those unseen territories in ones eye were camouflaged by the smiling faces and cleaver spoken words always pleasing to the ear, in fact is was enough to trap the most cautious individual. Soon the darkness took over, heavy and deep like water to an untrained swimmer, I soon found myself fighting for air desperately struggling for the top, I would soon discover later here there is no top. So beware the next time you wander into a small town for you too can be devoured by uncertain evil that lurks just beyond paradise. Remember sometimes what's pleasing to the eye can be fatal to ones soul.
DePoWeR2004
Wenesday , December 1, 2004
My daughter Tiffany and I were coming home this past weekend, a long side her job here at the station Tiffany also works for SEARS. She’s a busy girl! Anyway we were driving home Saturday evening and off the main road a piece there stands a house with two neon signs in the windows, one reads Palm Reader and the other a purple shaped crystal ball. I spoke out loud “I’ve always wanted to go in there!” Tiffany laughed and said “me too.” I slowed down and u-turned, Tiffany said are you serious? As we pulled up to the place is was dark and cold the reflecting neon cast an eerie glow in the cab of the truck, we both opened our door and walked to the entrance. I pushed the heavy wood door open, welcome a tiny voice announced from behind a counter. Thanks I replied. We, I mean…would like to see…the well. She’s with someone right now; it’s $10.00 each for a palm reading. Oh, ok and so I handed her a twenty, we sat down in the only two chairs in the room when three men dressed in black emerged from behind her curtain. I looked at Tiffany and said, “great we decide to stop in on the day they get busted…just great. The three men looked down at us and said, take it easy, stay put and we’ll be out of here shortly. That’s when we saw him, I stood up to see if I were dreaming or something, but no it was “The President” as he approach me he stretched his arms and grabbed me, the war is over…son we’ve won the war! I swallowed deep and mustered my strength and replied, “great! He turned and all four walked out the front door. Tiffany and I glanced at each other as to say wow! Next! A hoarse voice shattered the silence. We walked through the curtain; please have a seat she suggested. I’m sorry I interrupted, but was that? The man who just left was that George W. yes it was she answered. He just told us the war was over and the U.S. had won, this must have just happen, we haven’t heard anything on the radio. Oh no! She said, I tell him that every month.
DePoWeR2004
Friday , December 3, 2004
It’s come to my attention that I too can use wrongful thinking. Recently I spoke with a good friend Jeff Lenz, who by the way is gay not that it matters except only by the reason for this entry. We always seem to judge others by their looks, or lifestyle never taking time to view their point of view. All of us are human and each has feelings, sometimes such different feelings it temps us to judge that human. That’s the worse possible thing you could ever do to another person. Who lies next to my friend at night is neither my business nor yours. If you ever say “God Bless America!” Remember that includes all of us. We should judge ourselves before we ever judge another, and even then it’s still WRONG!
DePoWeR2004
Monday , December 20, 2004
With the sound of the 80’s bouncing in my head I turned and glanced at her. The moment our eyes met I remember how warm she made me feel. We spent most of the day Sunday playing trivia at “Buffalo’s” all to the tune of “Great White, Motley Crew and Twister Sister.” After the guessing game at the bar, that’s when the real fun started.
For the first time in years I feel alive, it’s good to feel your own heart beat!
Thanks Lyn for being here!
I embrace 2005 with the glimmer of promised hope envisioned by my heart, inspired by hers
DePoWeR2004
Wednesday , April, 27 2005
She has transformed me!
DePoWeR2005
Tuesday , May, 03 2005
Too much to understand, and to comprehend to think why I haven’t written here in awhile. I’ve thought of you and your always-listening ear and full understanding of my thoughts and me. Life moves so fast for so many and sometimes not fast enough. That bright star I spoke about months ago still hangs on by my side, she must by now fully understand who and what I am. Her smile and tender touch brings my breathing to a steady pace. Death and turmoil has had it’s run in the past few months I’ve held on tight and the light is there up ahead, never give up on that which you hope for most. Prayers are answered and the dreams change!
DePoWeR2005
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